I really have compassion for your predicament. I’m not fat, but I have a large bust and an hourglass shape. Fortunately, I no longer am under a mother’s control, so I do have the benefit of Spanx.


1.Buying the right shape of dress will help immensely. Or having the right attitude. Or the right accessories.
A-Line dress. This is pretty much a shape that is universally flattering. It is smaller at the top and flares a bit around the or a bit above the natural waist. It can be smooth front or have a waist seam, but the fact it is designed to not cling to the stomach as much helps hide a lot of the area MANY women are sensitive about

The Empire Dress(this is the correct spelling). More fitted or closer fitting at the top to just under the breasts, then flowing below the breasts. Another universally flattering style. The top is closer fit across what is generally a smaller portion of the body, drawing the eye up. The looser fit below the breasts means it is less likely to cling where you don’t want it to.

2. Cut, fabric, patterns, the shape can all help hide or camouflage a bit of “extra”.
A wrap dress. Made popular ages ago by Diane von Furstenberg, the bit of gathering and the fact the wrap of the dress draws the eye across the body instead of allowing the eye to zero in on one spot help. It can be fitted or flowing, but the X across the front from the wrap and the belt and gathers keep the eye from staying in any one place.


3. The right belt and/or print. Adds visual interest and keeps the eye from being drawn to your sensitive area.
Other accessories can help as well, a scarf, a long necklace, a large purse, a bold statement necklace, Or mix and match necklaces with belts, etc.


4. Also I know you said no to tummy control or Spanx but I have found that even just “full briefs” or high waisted knickers can help with just flattening the podge out a bit, especially with a clingy dress material. Or buy some bike/gym shorts and wear them under dresses which also means if a sudden gust of wind catches you unawares you're not flashing everyone (plus a lot have pockets which are awesome!) That's what my sister does for every wedding she goes to when she doesn't want to carry a handbag.

5. Try clothes with a skin fit on chest area and frills after that covering your tummy. Umbrella skirts, an alkali suits etc. They will accentuate your structure. And it does not matter… REALLY!!! Be confident in yourself. All women are pretty, it just needs correct person to notice their beauty.